Looking Back On My Conversion
There are many things that I can understand better now about my salvation than I could the moment it happened. We seem to have better hindsight than right now sight or future sight. At least we can understand more about the past than we can about the future.
First of all, I didn*t know that my big problem was sin. All the problems that seemed so big were just little problems caused by the big one. I went through what I might call a mid-life crisis. I was miserable and didn*t know why. I was disappointed with myself. I didn*t know that the only escape from being disappointed with myself was to be pleased with God. I did not know that the only thing that would please me was to be the new creature that He wanted me to be. I failed to meet my own standards and goals. I didn*t understand that I needed God to meet His standards in me and bring me to His goals. I didn*t understand that having His goals as my goals was what I needed. I couldn*t even love myself anymore. I didn*t know that what I needed was His love. I became unable to trust myself. I finally learned that I needed to trust Him. I couldn*t make myself happy. I learned that only He can make me happy. I was helpless. I found out I needed His strength. I reached the end of myself. I did not know that was the only place I could find Him. I ran out of me. He supplied me with Himself. I was an empty shell. I learned that only He could fill me. I quit on myself and then He started working on me. Somehow I knew that I couldn*t survive and function another day without Him. Somehow I knew I was helpless and only He could meet my need. All of it happened at exactly the right time. When I hit the bottom He was there to break my fall and lift me up.
Psalms 40:2: He brought me up also out of an horrible pit, out of the miry clay, and set my feet upon a rock, and established my goings.
The horrible pit was my sin.
Care to discuss Looking Back On My Conversion with Ron?